In my previous post I was advocating for the serious need for parents to be on the look out for signs that their children might be feeling isolated.  I also mentioned that there are many kids who appear jubilant and content when they can actually be troubled and screaming inside for the world to hear them out, to pay attention to them.

The worst that can happen is for parents to lose a kids and never know exactly why. There are many of these parents. These are attested by relative and friends  who also are puzzled why their friend or sister brother chose not  to live any longer without showing any signs of trouble.

Actually the signs are there. But oftentimes we are not attentive and present enough to recognize them.  When I was sharing my project to help kids and parents in the area of financial literacy training for their kids  4/10 parents lament that they do not have TIME to take the training,  let alone try to engage their children in the program I was trying to offer them.

Part of my standard answer is that if you as parents do not have time for your kids, then who do you expect to take the lead and time for the development of your children?   The psychologists, doctors,  pastors,  sports coach were helpful only after parents first took the time and effort to realize there was a problem and made the effort and time to bring the child to the right person who could help.

In all kinds of problems related to children the first and foremost part of the children is for the parents to give the children TIME and ATTENTION.  The good news is that there is actually a way to give all the kids the attention they need with out asking for a miracle to expand the hours in a day.

The Action Impact Team put on time, effort and resources to help parents protect their children from anything that could make them susceptible to suicide as a solution to a problem.  Specifically they came with this simple but powerful guide for parents.  It does not take away extra time from parents but in fact show parents that all it takes is a conscious effort for parents to direct what they already are doing to them  children in such a way that the children feel the parents are always there for them and will not doubt their parent are ready to hear them out anytime.

This strategy is coined as  G-I-V-E .  It is meant to make us feel that is the best and sometimes easiest solution is one of giving:

G - GREET and Meet: Talk to your children everyday and consistently. Grant them daily hello and warm but not intrusive hello, ask them how they are progressing or coping with that teacher, classmate or project.

I - INVOLVE  yourself with children school activities. Know their friends genuinely.

V - VALIDATE them anytime and all the time. Tell them they matter to you everyday.  Do not take any of their accomplishments of progress they made E

E - EMPATHIZE  Be a listening ear, take time to be fully present. Make them feel you are truly one with them in the moment, that you are their fully present, that they matter. Do not try to solve all your children’s  problem, your children’s hurts and feelings.  They do not expect it. They only expect you to understand them.

These GIVE-ing steps would go a long way, yet we often take for granted. They do not take any additional slice of our time. They actually would make little things we do become significant and healthy family traditions.